when adjustment isn't a nice thing

November 21, 2008 - Friday

due to alot things.. bitch who supposedly accommodating me coz im just a newbie but there making me out of place, eating lunch at 3pm, going home at 8pm (and later for my officemates)... my heart can't handle anymore.. what i did was i went lunch by my lonesome self.. called my friend Cathy at cried at the phone.. can't take this anymore... i ate my instant noodles at the not-so-nearby seaside.. if ever people are staring at me and thinking why my eyes are reds and swollen, i dont care anymore.

thats the first time i cried that hard bcoz of work..

November 22, 2008 - Saturday

Apparently, yesterday one of my seniors from the other division but still within Human Resource Department, went to me and asked if there is something wrong with me (she saw me last friday and she noticed)

being a drama queen as i am, i cried in front of her *take note im in my office seat good thing there only few people who apprently noticed me*. Ang just comforted me by saying its alright.. blah blah.. of course i was ashamed admitting im hurt but i have to let those nasty stuff inside me off so i could be free from them.

later, 2 of my officemates who noticed me crying that time asked me why and of course i just said thats nothing. But one of them, pointed out that i shouldnt trust a person easily. Apparently, that senior whom i confided with awhile ago is said one of "turncoats" in the office. For a while i felt nervous coz she could use what i said against me someday, but what can i do? its a surge of feelings. I didnt expect someone not from my own division would be so nice to me like that --something i expect more with people surrounding me. I was always prejudged as snobbish at similar so i was really glad there's someone who at least cared for what i feel during that time when i needed someone most. I still have a long way to run and more things to learn, but I will not forget those people who's surprisingly concerned about me...